~:+:flying like an angel:+:~

para maiba naman…hehehe…walang magawa eh…
kakagaling ko lang sa sakit kaya e2 babad ulit sa pc…
i miss my pc…i miss the "bookmarks" and visit those fave sites…
i miss my chars (pRO thingy)…i miss a lot of things here…

1. phones (my sun and smart)
2. 2 combs (color pink pareho…ung malalaking ipin at ung maliliit)
3. of curs wallet ko…nyay…can’t be (color pink din…eh ano ngayon hate ko pink eh)
4. tissues…(wet at ung tissue lang)
5. clips..(hindi paper clips ha…hair clips…)
6. baby powder…(just incase matagal ako sa labas at magshashine ung fez ko…oily…hehehe)
7. lip balm…(cherry cherry flavor..ala lang i don’t wear lipstick kasi kaya yan na lang)
8. cologne at perfume…(cologne ginagamit ko if mainit sa labas…perfume kung medyo malamig….like kung gabi..but i have them both sa bag lagi..

9. ballpen at paper (incase of emergency…nyahahaha)

10. my pink rosary…(nga pala bigay ko sau yung isa…alam mo na kung sino ka…pink din hahaha)
11. lastly, my medicines…(hayzzz sa hindi nakakaalam…walking pharmacy po ako…nyahahaha)

yan…hehehe…wala lng…makatulog na nga…baka kung ano ano pa masusulat ko dito…hay sakit ulo ko…(^_~)

a year ago we said "hi’s" & "hello’s"
when i think of the past 12 wonderful-tearful months
my heart begins to race

so much time has passed us by
through past mistakes and stupid things
which i said and done but didn’t mean it
through tears and laughter

today im reminded of all that we’ve been
from our first hi and hello
from our first email and phone call
from our first long talks
from our first *buzz* and our long chats
from our first goodbye, to our long distance calls
from our first laughs, remember the "oo gusto ko malaman"?
from our first tear drop….
from our first sorry, thank you, i miss you and i love you

a thousand "Thank You So Much"
just for coming into my life
for letting me feel your love and care

ilang beses ko inisip kung bakit time’s so unfair
putting us in this situation, making us hope and wait, leading
us to believe…
that no matter how far, no matter how long,
our love will stay strong, nothing could go wrong…

kadalasan wala akong sagot…lagi ako nagtatanong
hindi ko maintindihan, hindi ko alam paano
marami akong gustong sabihin pero ang hirap ipaliwanag
im learning to have a hard heart pero kadalasan umiiyak lang
ako
wishing na isang araw i can get over everything and so with
you

i still care for you, perhaps that will not stop
still one of the closest person in my heart
if the choice is mine, i will never let you go
but even if i have to, i want you to know
"I will only do so for i love you more than I need you!"

from someone…..

August 25 was the day..
No one ever have expected..
Gates of your heart suddenly closed..
Eliminating me from inside..
Leaving me alone..

Kingdom of eternal love..
Has always been a promise to both of us..
And yet after months of struggle..
Time to separate ways has come..
Eventhough.. I want you to know..

I‘ll always be loving you..

Whatever we have shared in the past..
All those memories we once had..
Nights of happiness..
Tears of sorrow..

Yesterday’s of our past..
Over the pains inside my heart..
Untill my very last breath..

Beautiful and fresh..
All of them will be kept..
Coz having you out of my life..
Kills me fast but silently..

isang araw ika’y nabigla nung sinabi ko "it’s over"
marami kang tanong, "bakit?", "ganun na lang un?", "so soon?",
"how come?", "ano nagawa ko na ayaw mo?", "bakit ganito?"
sagot ko lang…"ewan"…"d ko alam"…"i think its the right thing to do".
kahit mahirap sayo tinanggap mo kung ano naging decision ko, nagdusa ka, umiyak ka,
naguguluhan ka…you respected everything…

ilang beses ko sinubukan na makalimutan mo ko pero hindi mo magawang lumayo sa side ko
ilang beses kitang sinaktan
ilang beses kitang pinaiyak
ilang beses kita pinaasa sa mga bagay
ilang beses ako nagpromise pero hindi ko natupad at sa halip nasaktan ka pa
PATAWAD….

akala ko tapos na ako sayo at akala ko i had finally moved on
pero ngayon naisip ko hindi pala, dyan lang sya hindi nawala
ngayon, pinapangarap ko na bumalik lahat sa dati
when we’re so happy that nothing matters…
marami akong nagawang mali at narealized ko lahat ngayon
i still compare everyone to you…you’re different from them…
YOU’RE TRUE…

gusto ko magpasalamat sa mga panahon na hindi mo ko iniwan
kung nasaktan man ako alam ko triple yung sakit na naramdaman mo,
salamat sa mga advices,
salamat sa walang sawa kakalisten sa mga problema ko,
salamat sa prayers,
salamat sa panahon na nandyan ka, mapa-happy man o sad ako…
SALAMAT….

lagi mo sinasabi na "bumalik na ikaw"…yes i do..
kaya lang minsan may mga bagay na hindi ko maiiwasan mangyari
at umaatake pagkahibang ko…pagkapraning ko…sensya na!!!
you deserved everything kung ano meron ngayon,
and gagawin ko lahat para hindi mo na maranasan yung dati,
alam ko kung may isang tao dito sa mundo na sobrang
nakakaintindi sa akin ikaw yun…

December 26, 2005, night time…my wish came true and i never expected na mangyari lahat yun…that soon….at malaking bahagi ikaw sa wish ko na yun…

"You don’t have all the time I need but you have all the love I want"

When we first met we were both really happy. Many problems
came between us, the longer we stayed for each other the
harder problem came. But nonetheless, we decided we both
wanted a committed relationship and we were together for quite
sometime. We had our ups & downs as every couple does, but
we made it through a lot. It’s been about days/months since
we’ve broken up and I’m finally beginning to pick up the pieces
and try to love once again. There are times when I long for him
to be right there by my side and there are other times when I
realized why we aren’t together anymore. He will always hold a
special place in my heart, but sometimes you have to realize
that while you may love someone and while you may even be in
love with someone, it doesn’t mean that you are meant to be
with that person. I used to put my life on hold waiting for him to
come back so it could start again. But i think that will never
happen. Even though we’re not together, I learned a lot from him.
I learned how to love someone completely unselfishly and
without any worry as to how much it would hurt once they’re
gone. Though I’m not that naive now, I’m glad that I had the
chance to love and be loved by someone that is still very special
to me. I loved him then, I love him now, and I will always love
him. He may not be my first love but he will be the last person
I’ll let in. We aren’t even good friends now. We are not talking
about our new relationships and honestly im not prepared to
hear one, I surely will get hurt. But aside from that, I do hope
that someday we can be friends. Someone that I trusted & loved
so much, I just can’t imagine him not being a part of my life.
When I have good news, I want to share it with him. When I’m
upset, I want to lean on him. I am happy with my new life now
but here’s still something missing….HIM.

You were the one to run to, for a shoulder to cry on…
You were the one everyone relied on…
Any dreams or fears were safe with you…
I’ll admit I ran to you too…
We used to talk for hours about our futures…
Now I know none of it will ever happen…
I know if you were here you would tell me "Be strong"…
"Don’t cry" "I’ll be here waiting for you…"
I just want you to know you will never be far…
My mind will always be full of memories of you…
I know there’s a time we all must go…
MISSIN` YOU MORE~*

friend: im happy that both of you are through

friend2: hehehe hopefully makakaya ko lahat…salamat
sa concern…

friend: sa wakas narealized mo din lahat ng mali mo..

friend2: uu nga eh, natagalan din bago ko mafeel ang pain
but im okey now.

friend: good..

friend2: ikaw kasi eh, kung dati dati lang sinagot mo na
ako eh d na sana ako masaktan ng ganito…pero iniwan
mo din ako kasi pinili mo ung mas mahal mo…but i
understand u cant get over with it eh..hayzz forget the past…

friend: yan ka naman..

friend2: bakit, guilty ka?

friend:  hindi naman, wag na kasi natin pagusapan, tapos
na yun at pinagsisihan ko na…at isa pa im happy sa
current relationship ko…and i love my better half..

friend2: fine! good for you..im happy for you too..sana yan
na talaga ha…wag mong paiyak at mahalin mo..

friend: opo!
———

friend: oi musta na friend?

friend2: okey lang, e2 still surviving…hhehehehe

friend: basta lagi mong tandaan na nandito lang ako
ha…anytime…

friend2: wow so sweet..talaga lang ha na dyan ka lagi…

friend: uu naman!!! im just a text away…

friend2: thank you!

friend: nga pala nakita kita kanina kasama mo ex mo ah

friend2: awww un? wala kumustahan lang..

friend: wooo kumustahan tapos mamaya nyan malaman ko
na lang na nagkakabalikan na kayo..

friend2: hindi noh, i learned my lesson na noh…enough na
yung pain…

friend: talaga lang ha…narinig ko na yan dati sayo..kesyo
ayaw na…pero sa huli ayan kasama na naman

friend2: not dis time my friend..im okey now…maraming
reasons kung bakit ayaw ko na i can assure u na hindi na
talaga

friend: e2 sasabihin ko sayo ha…everytime nakikita ko
kayo dalawa…may feeling parin na selos sa akin..

friend2: nge selos ka dyan atupagin mo si <tooooot>.

friend: hindi seryoso, ayaw ko talaga makita kayo
magkasama, kasi alam ko gaano sya kasama, kung
gaano ka nasaktan ng dahil sa kanya…at masakit din sa
akin kasi…the man i hate ay sya naman ung man you
love.

friend2: sus 2 talaga..wala talaga..alam ko ginagawa ko
ngayon…

friend: wala na akong hinangad kung d kaligayahan mo

friend2: okey lang ako promise…

friend: sabi mo eh..ingat ka na lang lagi…o sya alis muna
ako at puntahan ko pa si <tooooo>

friend2: okey ingat friend *kiss*

friend: *kiss*
——–

friend: ang ganda naman

friend2: alin?

friend: ung nakita ko

friend2: alin nga..gulo mo kausap

friend: nakita ko na magkasama na naman kayo

friend2: ngeks ano ka ba…wala nga kami…kaibigan ko na
lang ex ko okey?

friend: i tot iiwas ka na? i tot gawa ka ng paraan para you
will keep a distance…bakit ganyan?

friend2: teka nga bakit ka ba ganyan? alam ko ginagawa
ko..at wala akong dapat ikakatakot kasi alam ko d na kami
maging kami ulit..

friend: hay nako…sabi mo lang yan..

friend2: you dont trust me huh?

friend: wala lang…nagseselos lang ako..

friend2: you dont have to..may gf ka…dun mo ibuhos lahat
ng pagmamahal mo sa kanya, wag mo na akong pansinin
kasi okey lang ako…okey…at salamat ng marami sa
concern mo

friend: hindi eh…im talking to you as a friend…

friend2: basta im okey..

friend: nagseselos ako eh…

friend2: ano gusto mong gawin ko? magkulong sa kwarto
ko? nagkataon lang na lagi dyan ex ko nakakausap ko, at
masaya ako na nakakausap ko sya at alam ko kung saan
ako magstand…yun ba gusto mo ang mahirapan ako? at ngayon sabihin mo
na nagseselos ka? bakit? you think hindi ako nasasaktan
na kasama mo girlfriend mo? pero binaliwala ko yan dahil
alam ko na hindi dapat, tumatahimik ako kasi un ang
tama, nasasaktan din ako friend at nagseselos din ako,
pero i prefer to keep it sa self ko kasi un ang tama…kaya
sana maintindihan mo din ako….*crying*

friend: sorry kung may nasabi ako…

friend2: sana wag mo ako ikulong na nagiisa lang, gusto
ko din may ginagawa, may kausap…

friend: may ibang way naman eh…bakit off lagi phone
mo..gusto ko sana kita ikumusta ka man lang..

friend2: why? kasi alam ko kung sino lang makakausap ko
dun..one way para umiwas, one way sa gusto mong
"distance"…gumagawa naman ako ng paraan eh…it just
that may mga incident na hindi ko maiwasan…friend, e2
lang everytime na sinasabi mo na mahalaga ako sayo na
nagseselos ka, in some way masaya ako kasi somehow
mahalaga ako sau important ako sayo, pero bad thing
about it, im hoping something which i know its not right,
kaya nahihirapan ako sayo…just leave me like
this…nagpapasalamat ako sa concern mo…pero iba
approach mo sa akin eh…how can u say na dyan ka lagi
for me while dyan gf mo, nakakausap mo lang ako kung
wala sya, yes u drop some messages pero sandali lang
kasi dyan gf mo, if matagal man yan ay dahil wala
sya…ayaw ko naman ganun friend…galing na tau
dyan…nafeel ko na yan dati sa ex mo…pls dont make me
feel na 2nd choice mo ko…yes mahalaga ka din sa akin
pero sana wag mo naman ako ganitohin…sorry ganito ako eh emotional masyado…so sensitive kasi naguguluhan ako…ayaw ko masira "friendship" natin…i treasure that ng sobra…pls wag natin sirain….im sorry if iba dating ko sa mga nangyayari sa ating dalawa…ganito lang talaga ako..i think ahead…im sorry friend…

friend: okey im sorry…im sorry if iba ang dating sayo…im
sorry if ganyan naiisip mo…

friend2: dont think about it…

friend: o sigi alis muna ako…ingat ka palagi ha..kumain ka
na…gutom lang yan…take care…

friend2: swt at may mukha ka pang magbiro huh…bye
ingat ka din friend….

Not every online love relationship will make it through as a success
story. An online breakup can seem even more empty and alone than
breaking off a traditional relationship. Thoughts of self-doubt, wasted
time and more can overflow your mind. If you find yourself trying to
handle an online breakup use the following tips to help heal and move
on.

- Quit using the chat or place where you often communicated for a while it might be YAHOO / RPG / MIRC / FORUMS etc…
- Become more active outside of the computer. Chances are while
you were together you spent entirely too much time inside. Get outdoors
and visit some old friends.
-Develop a new Internet hobby or interest such as playing games (wag muna online games), learning how to make web pages, or learn how to use photoshop…
-Figure out what you want to do about finding a new love or start chatting with old friends you haven’t talked to in a while.
-Remove all reminders of your Internet love including pictures,
letters, printscreens, chat logs and other memorabilia. You don’t need to throw it away; just
remove it so you can’t see them for a while.
-Start a daily journal/blogs/diary (nyahahahha) to release all of your feelings. Chances
are you may not be comfortable talking with other people about your
online relationship. This is an excellent way to make sure things don’t
get bottled up and cause issues in future relationships.

may natatamaan dyan…woooooo aminin….agree or not? AGREE kaya ikaw kung gusto mo na sya iforget…try mo gawin those above things…it works..kahit nangangati na kamay mo, pigilan mo sarili mo, wag iturn ON ang pc…ako nga minsan pray ko na na sana masira modem ko eh…at least may reason kung bakit d makaOnline nyahhahaaha…sa iba i works ung QUIT QUIT thingy…pero mostly hindi…kc pag ON mo lang ng pc mo tapos nakita mo ung RO client ay nako so tempting, tapos click..tapos isipin mo "makasilip nga" tapos pag login ayun..ala na hehehehe…..

basta the best advice ung sa taas…it really works…un lang *bow*